"It's only smart to date your friend's ex-boyfriend if you want to dump your friend. My patients are left feeling betrayed by both their friend and ex-boyfriend and filled with hurt and anger," said Fran Walfish, psychotherapist. On the other hand, there are some cases that I know of where it worked out.
These cases occurred during middle age when all parties had the chronological and emotional life-experience and maturity to better deal with the powerful feelings that accompany this type of emotional shake-up," Walfish said.
Lisa Bahar, LMFT, LPCC, said, "Depends on the circumstance of the relationships between all parties, if one or both have unresolved issues due to the breakup, then it is most likely not a good idea.
If there is one that wants the other back and the dating of the one that is considering getting involved, they may get hurt, it really depends on how the relationships are dealt with before the new dating experience occurs." "There tends to be a connection that is undeniable between the original two that were together before.
A typical friendship would entail you to have lived vicariously through your best friend's relationships.
Right from the dizzy 'I am in love' chase to the suffocating 'why me' break up (well in most cases). Wouldn't dating their ex feel like a violation of your conscience?
Having both parties treat your wounded buddy with sensitivity can go a long way, and—who knows? Keep your relationship private Your friend may still be wallowing in the purgatory that is wondering what he did wrong to lose the woman you’re currently hitting it off with. Rather than ruining a potentially great relationship before it even begins just for his sake, be honest with him about the situation—you like her, and she likes you—hear him out and move forward keeping private things private.
Chandler Parsons is dating the former flame of Leo Di Caprio.
'Do what makes you happy and deal with the consequences later' works for some as the perfect mantra.
If this fresh start makes you happy and you are willing to risk stepping down on the friendship ladder and face the probable repercussions, then by all means go ahead.
Basically, everybody’s dating everybody (and we’re cool with that) but when you make the moves on another guy’s ex, there are a few rules you should live by—and they have nothing to do with antiquated and sexist notions of “bro code.” Here’s how to respect your new girl and keep your friend.
Get over ‘man rules’If your buddy’s over his ex, there’s no reason not to date her.